I can’t do this. I can’t fucking do this.
Jesus: It's important to help those less fortunate than you. Treat them as your brother.
Christian Conservatives: *hurriedly turn the page*
remember when i hoarded the url “ihatetomhanks” because i was afraid someone who actually hates tom hanks will have that url so i was like “no one is allowed to hate tom hanks not on my watch”
I’m sleepy and I wish I was kissing you.